the beetle + the mourning ring

You know how I have science-based beliefs regarding life and death, how I know that my mom is gone. Dead. Cremated. Mixed with the dirt and the earth. Currently sitting on a shelf, growing into a tree and now swirled into a piece of jewelry I wear. You know how I don’t really believe in

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The Dead Moms Club – a book review

It has been SO long since my last blog post about books. It’s one of the most popular post requests I get. The thing is, I just have not been reading very much lately… at all. I have to be in the mood to read and on top of that one bad read will set

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six months / things I want to tell you

Yesterday marked six months since my mom suddenly passed away. I don’t blog about grief as much as I want to. Well, I mean, I don’t want to but I do feel like it’s healthy and… important, honestly. Having conversations about loss is essential. As a society, we suck at talking about death. Sure, everyone

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my mother’s plants

Grief for me has been cycling through the polar opposites of ‘save everything!’ and ‘throw it all away!’ Sorting through her storage room in my dad’s garage a few weekends back with my sister-in-law, I found myself when asked what to do with something, more often than not, answering “Goodwill pile!” Guess it was just

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grief & road trips

Before I lost my mom, I didn’t realize how messy grief was. I knew people were sad after they lost a loved one but I didn’t understand the extent of it. I honestly feel really guilty about that. I think as a culture we could do better about talking about death and helping the grieving

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I cry over four leaf clovers

Up until last year, I had never found a single four-leaf clover. Over the summer of 2018, I found maybe seven total. That was with me looking constantly. Every patch of grass, nearly every time I went outside. I was happy with that number too! It was exciting. In the past week, I’ve found over

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grieving in the digital age

I think I want to unfriend my mom on Facebook. She passed away suddenly around a month ago. One night shortly after it happened my dad handed me her phone to check on something for him. I quickly slipped onto her Facebook app and sent myself a friend request. For a few years now I’ve

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the greatest loss

This is my least favorite post I will ever write. I feel like I need to put it out there to start to heal though… Last Saturday, completely unexpectedly, my mom passed away from a heart attack. I don’t think anyone is ever prepared to lose a parent but to say this took me by

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